Scarred
by UchihaAkimoto
Summary: The scream that erupted from the bathroom echoed in the entire hospital. : YAOI, SasuNaru :


**Disclaimer:** I don't own Naruto.

**Warnings:** YAOI (SasuNaru); fluff. Hints of homophobia. Not a happy story, no. _Not_ a corny ending (hate those). I think you'll like it if you give it a chance. It's similar to **Null & Void** and its sequel, **Touched**, yet very different.

**Dedicated to: **My younger brother, who recently got a scar. And also for my younger sister, who's free from scars, but very much into yaoi.

**Scarred**

It was not as if he cared. He got to hear it daily, so it shouldn't have been such a big deal. Yet, he had done the stupidest thing in his entire life, and turned around to show that it indeed mattered to him. Maybe he had brought it upon himself, but he hadn't thought that a simple glare would trigger those men behind him.

In fact, he thought that it was the young, curvy girl that had the entire thing started.

Now – almost an hour after he had sent the glare to the people walking behind him, taunting him – he wasn't so sure if he ever wanted to show himself on these streets anymore. He didn't even find the strength to sit up and pull out his cellphone from his jeans pocket. He knew that he needed to call someone, because it was very foolish to just lie on the asphalt on a day like this.

It was snowing, thin flakes falling from the navy blue sky. He narrowed his eyes, focusing, trying to move. He let out a light groan, clenching his eyes shut as pain coursed through his lean body. With another groan, he heaved himself up. This time, he succeeded. He leaned against the brick wall behind him, wondering when they had dragged him into the alley.

The smell that reached his nose was far from pleasant, and he sent a meek glare towards the garbage bins down in the corner. It was too dark for him to actually see them, but he knew that there should be some form of junk down there. After all, he walked past this alley at least twice a day – to work, home from work.

He moved his hand, noticing how badly it shook when he reached for his cellphone. The blood on his wrist became smeared on his jeans as he stuck two long, shaky fingers inside of his front pocket. He brought the cellphone out, staring at the blue numbers on the screen.

Half past eleven.

It wasn't even that late, when things like this happened. He closed his eyes again, the tears burning against his eyelids. With a whiny moan, he used his thumb to dial a number. He brought his hand up, pressing the phone against his cold ear. His hand was still shaking, his eyes closed. The dial tone was screaming in his ear, and he let out a broken sob when no one answered.

"Please," he whimpered. The tears leaked through his dark eyelashes. The salty drops were achingly hot against his cold, scraped skin. His cheeks were dirty, but the tears did nothing to wash it away. "Please," he begged in a small whisper. "Answer."

There was a small bump in his throat, and all of him was burning. He dropped the phone, bringing both of his hands to hide his face. He sniffed, despite himself. He had never been a person to cry. He cried on rare occasions – when people died, when people got hurt, when his first and only cat had died. But now, with his body aching so badly...

He really needed someone to hold him.

He tried to sit differently, so that the pain wouldn't be so disturbingly sharp. But it didn't work, if something, the pain only became worse. He had never broken a single bone in his body before, even though he had always been a wild child. But he guessed that this was how it felt. He scrunched his nose at the pain in his ribcage, wondering if one of his ribs was indeed broken.

His phone suddenly let out a small buzz, and he averted his watery eyes to it. It buzzed again, becoming louder and louder for each second. It was with an unsteady hand that he brought the phone up to answer, only to have his tongue knot and a sob to break out from his throat.

"_Naruto?" _

The voice was harsh, and it made him flinch. He closed his eyes yet again, breathing out slowly, only to find that it hurt.

"_I can hear you, Naruto."_

The voice was still angry, blaming and _harsh_. He didn't want to face the other man's wrath, even though he knew that he probably deserved it a little. He was two hours late, after all. It wasn't that he was late often, but it happened that he had to stay at work from time to time, to make sure that everything was done before the weekend.

"_Good lord, Naruto. Just answer me already!" _

To this, Uzumaki Naruto started crying again. He could hear the worry and impatience in the other's voice, and he felt so guilty. Why had he gotten himself into trouble like this? Why had he thrown that glare at them – he should have ignored the insults, he should be used to them by now!

"_Na-Naruto?"_

"Please," he cried. His voice was hoarse and uncertain, breaking more than twice in each word he spoke. It hurt so much. "Please, Sasuke..."

"_Naruto, honey, where are you? Are you at work?"_

Naruto shook his head slowly, not thinking clear enough to know that Sasuke couldn't see him. He inhaled, a sharp pain immediately following. It was getting cold, but he couldn't feel it. The hot blood that ran from his wrist kept him warm, along with the burning pain and the scorching tears. He gasped when he heard people walking by the alley, his paranoid mind wondering if the group was returning.

"_Naruto! Listen to me, damn it. Where are you?"_

Naruto closed his eyes, the first answer that popped up in his mind being – I don't know. But after a few seconds of thinking, listening to Sasuke's impatient breaths, he remembered. "In the alley between the old fire station and–"

"_Okay,"_ Sasuke cut him off rudely. It was a thing that he didn't often do, even though Naruto always talked so much. _"I'll be there in less than five minutes. Can you wait for me in five minutes, Naru?"_

Naruto breathed through his nose, noticing that it didn't hurt as much if he did. "Yes," he croaked. He wanted to add 'hurry,' but knew that Sasuke would be with him as fast as he could. If Sasuke used _that_ tone – that caring, loving tone – something was either very serious, or Sasuke was very drunk.

He let the cellphone fall from his loose grip, not finding the strength or will to keep it by his ear anymore. He knew that Sasuke was coming for him, so he didn't need to worry anymore. Sasuke would be there... He could close his eyes now. If he fell asleep, it wouldn't hurt. With a soft, broken sigh, Naruto closed his eyes to keep both the tears and the pain away.

UAUAUA

Light.

He fluttered his eyes open, closing them immediately again. It was so bright, and he wasn't sure if he was ready to face reality yet. He let out a small huff, letting whoever might be in the room to know that he was awake. He heard hurried steps, and he opened his eyes slowly yet again. This time, it wasn't as bright.

"Naruto." It was a mere whisper; a breath of relief following. Sasuke sat down on the hospital bed's edge, reaching out a hand to caress an injured chin. Naruto couldn't see the red mark that was on his chin, but he felt it. "Naruto, baby."

Sasuke leaned down, and Naruto knew what it meant. He parted his lips, not with his usual enthusiasm, and let Sasuke kiss him properly. He reached up with a shaky hand, the wrist wrapped in a thin layer of white bandage. His slender fingers were soon tangled in Sasuke's raven-coloured hair, pulling the older man closer.

"Who did this, baby?"

Sasuke's voice was so different. It sounded nearly foreign to his ears. Usually, Sasuke's voice was much stronger – harsher. Naruto had wondered what Sasuke would be like if he sounded caring for once, but now, he didn't know if he wanted to know after all. He wanted his impolite, harsh Sasuke. Not this sweet, caring replica. He needed someone strong.

"Tell me, Naruto."

When Sasuke's normal tone returned, Naruto actually chuckled. It was a dry, humourless chuckle. Sasuke looked down on him, his eyebrows knitted together and dark circles under his dark eyes. Naruto sighed, closing his eyes when his lover reached out to touch him. Sasuke's fingertips played over his sensitive neck, up to his cheekbone – tracing a wound that Naruto didn't know of.

UAUAUA

The scream that came from the bathroom not an hour after Naruto's awakening echoed in the hospital.

UAUAUA

Three hours after Naruto's discovery, the blonde had yet to stop crying. Sasuke was sitting on the hospital bed behind him, embracing him. Naruto sobbed and whimpered. Sasuke sat there, holding on to him, feeling more helpless than he had ever done before. It wasn't until Sai-sensei, the doctor, arrived with a psychiatrist that Sasuke managed to calm Naruto down a little.

The psychiatrist, a woman named Haruno Sakura, sat down by the bed. Sai-sensei exited the room, closing the door with a soft sound. Sakura was lean, a little taller than Naruto, and was very pretty. Her eyes seemed to light her entire face up; the emerald colour something very different from both Sasuke's and Naruto's.

She had her silky, pink hair in a knot on her head, glasses on the tip of her nose. Naruto vaguely thought that the glasses were fake, only there to make her look serious in all her sweetness. He looked away from her, still trying to hide the ugly wound that grew from his collarbone to his cheekbone.

It was bright red, disgustingly yellow and crimson around the poorly made stitches. It wasn't only long – going all the way from his face to the end of his throat – but also wide; widest on his throat.

"Would you mind leaving the room, Uchiha-san?" Sakura asked sweetly, chewing on the tip of her pencil. Sasuke merely sent her a dark look, showing that he had no intention of leaving without Naruto. She didn't even raise a brow at his glare, seemingly used to it. "Is that okay with you, Naruto-kun?"

Too busy obsessing with hiding the hideous wound; he didn't even notice that she was on first name bases with him already. He didn't see how she was watching his every movement, ready to analyze whatever 'strange' thing he could possibly do.

"He's fine with that," Sasuke answered in his stead. It was so usual that Sasuke answered for him that Sakura even didn't notice. It sounded normal. As if the tall, pale man always responded in Naruto's place, because the blonde was busy doing things of his own.

"Let's start then," she muttered to herself. Naruto really didn't listen closely. "Do you remember what happened to you, Naruto-kun?"

He glanced at her, wondering why she wanted to know that. Sasuke had told him that if Naruto didn't want to, he wouldn't have to answer the questions. But he managed to bite his lip and look at her, to see her encouraging face and beautiful features. He sighed in defeat, and he felt Sasuke relax slightly behind him.

"I was just going home from work and..." Naruto chewed on his lower lip as he continued, some words coming out more muffled. "They were just some homophobes looking for someone to play with – and I happened to turn around and glare at them. That's it."

Sakura nodded slowly, her eyes slightly narrowed. He felt Sasuke hug him tighter, nuzzling his nose in Naruto's hair. Normally, this wouldn't happen in public, because both Sasuke and Naruto were private persons. But now, even if there was a psychiatrist there with them, Naruto needed the comfort.

UAUAUA

Two months after Naruto left the hospital; he had yet to go to work. He sat there in their warm, cosy apartment, doing nothing and everything. The wound that trailed from his collarbone to his cheekbone was covered by bandage and big, white band-aids. It didn't hurt anymore, and he was supposed to have taken it off last week.

Even though Sasuke, Sakura-sensei and his doctor, Sai, had told him to remove it in different ways, he didn't find the will. Instead of removing what was covering his disgusting scar, he had gone out to buy some new clothes.

That was the only time in two months that Naruto went out. He had been out for merely two hours, having worn a discreet jacket with the hood pulled up to cover as much as possible. When he came back, Sasuke had been glad for him – thinking that Naruto was recovering from the shocking experience. But no. Instead, Naruto had gone out to buy new shirts.

Naruto had always liked loose, baggy clothes. They made him feel free, unlimited. But in the bags he had come home with, were nothing but turtle necks and sweaters with big hoods. And even though the bandage and the band-aids covered his ugly scar, he was ashamed. So ashamed that he cried whenever Sasuke left for work.

His once strong persona had flown out through the window – only to land on the snowy asphalt and die a painful, bone-cracking death. But his persona was replaced by a new him. A new him that he hadn't even known existed. It had always seemed to be impossible for Naruto to be someone else than his happy, carefree and satisfied self.

But here he was, sitting in the bed in the middle of the day, hugging his legs to his chest. Tears were dripping from his cheeks. How could he – Uzumaki Naruto – have gone from so strong to such a pathetic, paranoid person? It was embarrassing, even to himself.

It was a miracle that Sasuke hadn't left him yet.

Maybe it was just a matter of time. After all – who would want to live with an ugly person? He was disgusted by himself, and had yet to look at the scar again. He was scared of what he would see, what he was currently hiding from the world – from Sasuke.

UAUAUA

The sun was shining in on them, through the parted curtains. The snow was reflecting the sunbeams, making it impossible to escape from the warmth. It was beautiful, Naruto noted to himself. He was lying in the big, soft bed together with Sasuke, who was still fast asleep. He was sitting be the end of the bed, curled up into a small ball. He had lost a few kilos these two months, not having found the will to eat as much as he usually did. Sasuke didn't know, because he was working during the days, and it was easy to lie about eating.

He closed his eyes, breathing out through his nose. He flinched upon hearing a fist against their front door, wondering who in their right minds would drop by this early on a Saturday. He didn't want to get out of bed, because he knew who were knocking. His friends.

He had avoided meeting them in person for two months, and last week, they had had enough. They had been knocking for almost fifteen minutes before Sasuke threw the door open and told them to fuck off, because Naruto wasn't at home. It had been a lie, and the guilt that Naruto felt was almost as big as the shame over is hideous scar.

"Go open the door."

Sasuke's hoarse, deep morning-voice brought Naruto back to reality. He blinked, wondering what Sasuke mumbled about, before realising that he should go and open the door. He had talked to them over phone and text messages for two months – they deserved to know what was keeping him from going outside, in public.

When he crawled out of the bed, Sasuke sat up. "I can come with you, Naru," he offered. Naruto shook his head, his eyebrows knitting together as he put on one of Sasuke's old university sweaters. It was big and cosy – warm from having lain on the floor, in the sun.

He walked through the living room, heading for the front door. He unlocked it, and the knocking stopped. When he opened the door, he heard how two of his friends held their breaths. When the door was out of the way, he looked down on the floor, the hood covering his head and neck.

"Naruto!"

A gasp followed, emitting from him as he was hugged tightly. An arm brushed against his neck, and he automatically flinched. He made his way out of Ino's grip, her purple-coloured nails digging in his sweater to keep him in her clutches.

"Yo, man..." A manlier voice said from behind the tall, blonde girl. When Naruto finally got out of her grip, he saw that it was Shikamaru and Kiba, the latter having an impatient look on his rough features. Naruto took a small step back, wondering if they too would attack him. But they stayed where they were, and Naruto relaxed slightly.

"Naruto, how are you? Are you okay? Why haven't you let us meet you?"

"Ino," Shikamaru spoke up. "Leave him alone. He'll explain soon enough, you troublesome girl."

Kiba was practically bouncing on his spot, not sure what he was supposed to do. Naruto could almost see it in his brown eyes – wondering, wondering if he should jump Naruto just as Ino had done, or settle for a small 'hi.'

Naruto felt his eyes tear up. He hadn't met them in so long. And it frightened him – they would leave him this time, as soon as they discovered the ugly truth. He watched as Ino and Shikamaru hung off their coats, Kiba simply throwing his jacket on the floor, like always. They walked to the living room, Naruto leaning against the doorframe as Shikamaru and Ino took their seats in the gray sofa.

Kiba stood before Naruto, pulling down the hood slowly. Naruto let him, his eyes focusing everywhere but on Kiba. The brown-haired dog lover didn't make a face when he saw all the bandages. Instead, he embraced the shorter blonde, hugging him so tight that his broken rib left a stinging pain. He grunted at the pain, making Kiba let go immediately.

"Sorry," he whispered. He seemed to be insecure – but who wouldn't be?

"It's okay," he murmured. He raised his arms, wrapping them around Kiba's neck and pulling him in for a new hug. Kiba wasn't as harsh this time, but caressed his back soothingly. Naruto buried his face in Kiba's neck as he heard footsteps, knowing that it was Sasuke who had finally dragged his ass out of bed.

"Hands off."

Upon hearing Sasuke's low, warning voice, Kiba let go of his best friend as if he had burnt himself. He didn't even mutter about paranoid bastards this time. Usually, Naruto would start a small argument – he was allowed to hug whomever he wanted – and their arguments always turned into wild night activities.

But they hadn't had an argument in two months. It was unusual, but not a bad thing. Naruto would like to say that it was an improvement, but wasn't sure. Sasuke was afraid of making Naruto sad – whatever people believed, he didn't want Naruto to cry ever again. Especially not over something silly. And Naruto... He didn't want to give Sasuke more reasons to leave him.

His paranoia of Sasuke leaving him because of his disgusting looks was slowly taking over, creeping over him to consume him fully.

"What are you doing here in six in the morning?" Sasuke inquired, his voice still dangerously low. Naruto loved that tone – it could bring him to his knees if Sasuke said the right words.

"Shikamaru said that we should play on the surprise-card. Otherwise, we wouldn't catch our friend here," Kiba said and put an arm around Naruto's shoulders. He quickly removed the arm when Sasuke sent him a glare. Silence erupted.

They all knew what was inevitable – the bandages were just screaming for attention. Thankfully enough, neither Naruto nor Sasuke had to be the ones bringing the subject up.

"So, do you have a scar under there?" Shikamaru asked, not sounding very interested. But his tone was calm, and had anyone else said it, Sasuke might have punched them. Naruto nodded slowly. "Is that the reason as to why you have been avoiding us like the plague?"

Naruto nodded again, looking at his feet in shame. He felt a hand in the small of his back, rubbing small circles with the cool fingertips. He looked up at Sasuke, who was now beside him.

"You'll show us when you're ready," Shikamaru said with a lazy smile. "So. Do you have anything to eat?"

UAUAUA

Three days later, when Naruto went to the hospital again, he was not happy.

"You have to remove the bandages now," Sai-sensei growled. It was obvious that he was irritated – but who wouldn't be if the patient didn't obey. "Naruto-kun, listen to me. You really have to remove them. Unless you don't have the guts... Maybe you're not manly enough. You're behaving like a woman, you know."

UAUAUA

After a rough therapy session with Sakura, he was more or less forced to remove the bandages. When he came home, Sasuke was still at work, which could have been a good thing. But it only left him time to think of how Sasuke would react.

Would he make a face – Naruto could see the grimace before him – and then ignore it before packing his bags?

Would he scream out in shock and then leave without a word?

Would he even bother to come home? He knew that Naruto was to remove the bandages, after all. Would he send someone – like Itachi and Kisame – for his things and not bother to say goodbye?

Naruto crawled up in the bed, as he had done every day these two months. He sighed, keeping the tears at bay. Sasuke was so beautiful. He needed someone to match him and his good looks. Naruto had done that, two months ago. He knew that he had been good looking, and that his bright colours matched well with Sasuke's handsomeness.

Now, Sasuke would be the only gorgeous creature in their apartment.

UAUAUA

Naruto didn't even notice when Sasuke entered the room. He was crying into his hands, trying to hide from his surroundings. He failed to notice Sasuke's shocked expression when he entered the room, seeing Naruto there on the bed. He had promised himself to keep Naruto happy, after all.

"Baby?"

Naruto looked up, sniffing and wiping away the tears as quickly as possible. He tried to smile, but it disappeared immediately, and it made him hiccup in displeasure. He didn't like Sasuke's worried look. He knew that he was ugly. He knew it, he knew it.

Arms were wrapped around him, pulling him into a tight hug. "Oh, Naru... Don't cry, my beautiful baby doll..."

Naruto climbed up in Sasuke's lap, hiding his repulsive face in Sasuke's chest. "I'm ugly, Sasuke," he whispered through his tears. "I'm so, so ugly..."

Sasuke gave a small groan, pulling Naruto so close that it hurt in his ribcage. "You're not ugly, Naruto. You'll feel better soon."

"No! Sai-sensei has already told us! There are no operations that would help! I'm hideous! Ugly!" He pulled back, pointing at the scar that graced his otherwise beautiful body. "Have you seen me?!"

Naruto was right. It wasn't a very beautiful scar. It was red in the middle, turning darker along the uneven edges. It wasn't attractive at all, but Sasuke couldn't see where it was ugly. If it was a part of Naruto, he wanted it. It was just too bad that Naruto didn't see it.

"Please, Sasuke," Naruto whispered. The whisper was muffled, and had Sasuke not felt Naruto's lips moving against his chest, he wouldn't have noticed that Naruto was speaking. "Don't leave me. Don't leave me alone."

"What are you talking about, you moron?" Sasuke's voice was hollow, even to himself. It wasn't very convincing, even though he wanted it to be. "I'll never leave you."

UAUAUA

For the reminder of the week, Sasuke called in sick. He needed to show Naruto that he wanted – needed him. He wanted to show Naruto how beautiful he was.

Naruto wasn't sure if it was nice to have Sasuke around – giving him all the attention he had ever wanted – or if it was bad – maybe Sasuke would notice something bad about him.

UAUAUA

Taking a deep breath, Naruto sat down in front of the mirror. He closed his eyes, opening them again. He was starting to work today. He had woken up two hours earlier than he usually did, to prepare for his come back.

He had already put on one of his many turtle necks in grey and a pair of jeans that weren't too baggy or too tight. He would do anything to blend in. He had even considered to dye his hair, but Sasuke had told him no.

So, now he had time to put on his make-up. Ino had spent the last afternoon with him, teaching him everything he needed to know about powder, foundation and the alike. He had tried and tried the entire night, until he finally got it right. Ino didn't leave him until they were both satisfied with the results.

Now, it only took him half an hour to put on all these crèmes and make-up. And yet, the scar was still visible. The crimson shone through, and the edges were sharp against his normal, tanned skin.

But at least it was better. Because no one deserved to see such an ugly person as him. Therefore, he needed to make everyone a favour and hide it. Hide it, so no one could see it. For if they saw it... They would leave him.

When he was done, he looked it over once more.

Even though he could cover it a bit, he would know that it was there. It would be there, forever and ever.

It would be there when his co-workers greeted him. It would be there when his friends hung out with him. It would be there when Sasuke made love to him. It would always be there, covered with make-up for girls because he was such a disturbing sight.

Cover up. Hide.

But he would never be the same again. Nothing would be the same again.

**The End**

**A/N:** Reviews much appreciated! Constructive critism is craved. Thank you for reading!


End file.
